Roller Coaster Ride

Where do I begin? After having a kick ass time at the bon fire the following week was pure hell for me. Why, who knows? Wish I knew who was in charge of this roller coaster ride. I found myself upset and didn’t know why. My mind kept going back to how great the bon fire would have been if Mom and Dad were there sitting on a bale with all of us. Then I received an email that Aunt Edna was in the hospital. At first the news didn’t sound good, but I am happy to say at this time she is back home and on the mend.

Also that week I headed over to watch Emily play volleyball. That brought back all the memories of Mom and I going and watching Emma Lie play sports. Mom so enjoyed watching her youngest granddaughter. Then there was the email I got that week. I read it at work and was hoping no one would see me so upset at work. The email was beautiful, but caused a ton of emotions to come pouring out. Austin’s Mom had found an electric skillet at an auction. It was one like Mom used to cook with. Lessi said she didn’t need it but just bought it cause it reminded her of Mom. She started talking about the roast, potatoes, carrots and cooked cabbage that Mom use to make and how great it was. Like I said the dam broke and the emotions came. Luckily no one saw me. I did manage to regain my composure but when I got home it happened again. The next weekend did nothing, stayed home and had to break out the Will and Grace DVD’s. Nothing like Will, Grace, Jack and Karen to stop my emotional roller coaster, and it only took two seasons. So I have six more just in case.

This past week had its ups and downs too. Aunt Edna went back in the hospital, but like I said she is home now and doing better. I went again to watch Emily and this would be her last high school volleyball game. Yes that is correct my youngest niece is a senior. Her team played great but they ended up losing. I hated seeing Em so upset. Don’t know if it was the game or her realizing that she just played her last high school game. I am so proud of that girl. She is a sweetheart. She scored a 30 on her ACT. She is awesome at volleyball. Plus she is such a beautiful, caring and loving kid. (She reminds me so much of Betty Mae) Was looking at her senior pictures and OMG how can you pick just one. Have I told you how proud I am of her?

So Friday arrives and I am at work been there since about six that morning. It is about 9:30 and my phone rings. It is Austin. I ask him what he is doing cause he should be working. Then he proceeds to tell me that he is leaving work cause he just had a guy get killed like 10 feet away from him. I can tell he is upset. I don’t have any idea what to say. I let him talk and just listen. He tries to describe to me what happened and I don’t understand exactly. Somehow this man who was working with Austin, fell and ended up getting crushed and Austin had seen it all. He is telling me he wants to come over later and talk. I told him that I would be there for him no matter what. He never did come over but when I texted him, I found out he was with his girlfriend at church. I was relieved and glad he was there. He said he was doing better. The next day after reading the papers about what had happened I was even more worried. What a horrific thing to experience. I couldn’t even imagine and felt so useless. How could I help my nephew? I didn’t want to force the issue, wanted to give him his time to come to terms, but didn’t want him to keep it all in. I wanted to make sure he knew that I was here if he needed anything, so I sent him a text that morning saying I am here if you need anything. I worried all day about this kid, and then finally I called just to hear his voice and make sure. He sounded good. He had hear from the president of the boilermakers and other co workers that was there also. Monday morning is going to be harder than hell for him to go back there, but it is something that he has to do. So Herbie and Betty Mae watch over Austin Zane for me.

When it comes to Zane and Emma Lie they both hold such a special place in my heart. I watched these two grow into amazing adults. I am so proud of both of them and want to protect them as much as I can. When I see or talk to either one of them, I realize how special these kids are. They have been through so much, and still have great personalities and values. Austin Zane and Emily Marie, Auntie Red loves you both so much and is so proud of both of you.

Bonfire Blast

The best way to get out of a funk, at least in my opinion is to have a family get together. So I decided a few weeks back to have a bonfire at my house for Charlie, Ivan and Austin’s birthday, plus any other October birthdays out there. It was great but there was one bad thing was that Diane, Mike &Kim, Jim & Shannon, Mercedez, Hunter, and Ryan, Kevin & Caryn and Grey were not there with us. The weather was absolutely B-E-A-U-tiful! Plus I got to finally meet my great niece, Anna Belle. Yes it was worth the wait. I know I am biased but she is so B-E-A-U-tiful! Herbie and Betty Mae’s family is so blessed.

Some highlights for me…

• Bird walked over to my house in her new walker
• Did Turtle ever find any turkey mites in the grass?
• Seeing Anna Belle
• Watching Mama drink Billy Ray’s wine and being blinded by his jacket
• Happy birthday, Reggie you are Mama’s DD
• The crew deep-frying turkey on the basketball court
• Rod stoking the fire every 15 minutes
• The professional throwing style of Bob Cat, pictures available on Ebay
• Kids, kids, and more kids running amuck…oh the laughing and screaming
• The fire surrounded by straw bails and chairs and a whole lot of conversations
• The food! Thanks Kim, Mama, Sharon, and Ivan!
• Doing a shot of Gran Patrone Platinum with Zane, Happy Birthday, Wow that was smoooooth, Holy Shit how much did you say that tequila costs?
• Where did those kids get that toilet paper?
• Survivor - Morgan Corner
  Kids find a cricket
  Jimmy G. crunched it then down it went
  So do you think Emily kissed him good night?
• Stories, stories, stories and more among family and friends :)
• Sitting on Dad’s glider, holding Turtle watching her look at everyone and the fire
• Last ones left around the fire was Charlie, Keith, Ivan and me

Enjoy the picture slideshow below. :)

Bonfire Blast Pics....Enjoy :)

Owen Update...God is Great!

Update from Owen's Mom....

First and foremost, let me just say again how much we appreciate everyone's thoughts, prayers and support throughout this ordeal!!!! It has helped us so much to know people have been behind us and that we and Owen are so loved! For those of you who haven't heard, we got the most awesome news yesterday, that the mass they saw on the MRI was NOT a tumor as they suspected. The doctor has informed us that it appears to be 'white matter' and is calling it a 'lesion'. In fact, he corrected me when I asked him if the tumor was the reason why Owen was having the seizures. His response was "I'm almost 100% sure that the LESION is the cause of the seizures." As for what happens now we don't really know. He is going to meet with us this afternoon after we get the pathology results back to confirm his preliminary diagnosis. He said if it's white matter they have to determine why it's there and what, if anything, we need to do now. Matt and I both feel very strongly that it is no coincidence that this is the result, but rather that God's hand has been on Owen since this horrible ordeal started and that He has given us a miracle. I'm not sure where many of you are on your faith journeys, but ours has certainly been strengthened to a whole new level with this outcome!!! When we met with Dr. Leonard on Thursday, he was pretty positive that the image they were seeing was a tumor, and told us he had shown the film to 3 other doctors in hopes that one of them would disagree, but they were all in agreement that it did appear to be a tumor. One of the other neurosurgeons we spoke to on Monday before Owen went in for surgery said that based on the MRI and the growth he thought worst case scenario is that it would be a Level 2 Tumor. Honestly my best case scenario I was hoping for was a level 1 tumor, based on our meeting with Dr. Leonard on Thursday. He is a leading neurosurgeon and is very active in R&D, and the dr. we spoke with before O's surgery said he would discuss with us the possibility of saving some of the tumor if we approved so they could use it for research purposes. Of course we were ready to agree to that in order to find answers in hopes of sparing more families of having to go through this nightmare. Anyway, my point is this. Matt and I had everyone we know praying for us, and so many people passed that on to their friends and church families that we believe there were hundreds of people praying for Owen's health and healing, and we believe God answered those prayers. What a glorious day, and it was the BEST birthday present Matt could have ever asked for (yesterday was his b-day).
Anyway, I'll get off my religious soap box now, :), and let you know that Owen is doing well. He has been on morphene for the pain, so he was pretty much out of it all day yesterday. This morning he woke up for probably almost 2 hours and was very alert and in a better mood. He has been a trooper through all of this!!! We have discovered that through all of these MRI's and everything that he is quick to come out of sedation and is MAD when he wakes up. Normal routine coming out of surgery is for them to move the patient to a bed, roll them to recovery and once they move them to the ICU the parents are called back. They called us yesterday and asked us to come into recovery with him because he was fighting mad!! When the picked him up from the operating table to move him to his bed, he REFUSED to lie down, so they had to carry him, kicking and screaming, to the recovery room. The charge nurse in recovery told us when we got back there that they brought him in and put him on the bed to get all his lines hooked up and everything that he "Mopped the floor" with three of her nurses so they decided they better call us back! LOL SHe was laughing about it and actually said it's a very good thing for them to wake up and be active and alert like that. So we got to recovery and I sat on the bed and held him in my lap and he immediately calmed down and relaxed. They ended up rolling us to the PICU with me on the bed holding him. He's been doing great since then though. WE can tell that he is having some pain sometimes, but they are still giving him morphene. Once he starts eating they will switch him to Tylenol with codine for the pain. So far he hasn't had much interest in eating though. We wouldn't even touch the red popcicle they gave him. Today they will be removing the catheter, areterial line and the IV that is in his foot. He'll have one IV in his left hand still so they can administer meds, and they will be taking the bandage off of his head. They only had to shave a small section, so it won't be too noticable. He's moving out of PICU to a regular room today, and if he's eating, peeing and pooping ok they will let us bring him home tomorrow. There's barely any swelling at all. Amazing!

Thanks for all the support...Owen came home today.. :)

Prayer's for Owen

Got an email from my cousin, Lynetta and her little grandson Owen is having surgery Monday morning at 7:30 AM at Children's Hospital in St. Louis. An MRI found a tumor on his brain. She say they are all heartbroken but remain faithful he will have a healthy recovery. Owen is two yrs. old and will turn 3 on the 21st of this month.

Please keep him in your prayers.

Found this on the net...

Sticky fingers ' tangled hair, scattered crayons, everywhere.
Fancy artwork ' on the wall ' drawn by midgets ' three feet tall.
Tell me why ' and tell me how ' that was mine ' I want it NOW!
Fix my bike. Buy me gum. If you have it, I want some.
Dirty faces, grass-stained knees, learning words ' like pretty please.
Endless hugs & goofy wet kisses, learning respect with 'Mr.' & 'Mrs.'
Scraped-up hands, from falling down. Tender tugs - - on my night gown.
Need more paper ' for Santa's letter? I wasn't so bad ' but I've been better.
Watching a movie ' again and again ' Mommy, please ' put the tape back in.
Messy fingers ' hair gone wild ' all in the life ' of a precious child !!
By Debra S. Higginbotham

I am a slacker yesterday Jada Bird turned 5

Been a week of hell at work, had way too many blonde moments and that caused me more work. Hey it is the weekend now so YEAH! Yesterday was Jada's 5th birthday. She is a ray of sunshine, I know she can lift me up with just her smile. Don't you guys agree?
Next here are some links to some videos I finally uploaded. Like I said I am a slacker!

Golfing with Loser on her bday...you might be a redneck if....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1KzER5kbD8&feature=PlayList&p=5CA6D64496819D73&index=0&playnext=1

My visit with Grey...Hey Little man I will return...keep the Miller Lite cold. :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iwi3sobDMWk&feature=PlayList&p=8FBFA8345E7BF3D9&index=0&playnext=1

Sam...another ray of sunshine even though her and Jada are DOOOOOMED!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t46R9a2XJls

Tune in next week and I will have more from all of Jada Birds parties this weekend.

Later, Peace Out!

I remember...

I remember being at Mom and Dad's cause Loretta and Carrol were coming down. Dad was having a pretty decent day. He watched the Cub game and when Rett and Carrol got there he sat out on the porch with them. I remember Kim bringing him in saying that Grandpa is tired and wants to go lay down. Kim put him to bed. We continued to sit out on the porch visiting. Rett and Carrol headed home. Then shortly after that I headed home. I wasn't home but only a few minutes when I got the call. Dad wasn't breathing so I headed back. When I walked in Dad was on the floor and Mike and his wife were administering CPR. I knew when I walked in that he was gone. Mom gave me a phone and told me to call the others. I couldn't get a signal one on any cell phone and they were on the land line with 911. I wanted to throw the cell phones. The ambulances arrived, one from Cville and one from Sparta. The land line was open and I started calling. Next hours and minutes are a blur. One by one family members arrived. Dad had went in to rest and went peacefully. His fight was over. No more pain from the tumors, although he never complained of any pain at least to Mom or myself. No more radiation, no more chemo. This is the first year that I don't have Mom here to help me through this. 5 years and still hurts like hell. I went to the cemetery this morning. Kim, Candice and the girls went with me. I thank God for them every day, don't know what I would do without them. They make the really hard days, like today bearable. Love my Bird and Turtle, their smiles get me through. A double whammy today, cause it is also Renee's birthday. After we got back from Van, I ran over to Ivan's to check in. He was actually at Sparta so I missed him, but he was keeping busy working on his chimney. I am going to head back over tomorrow. On my way back from Ivan's, I took the scenic route as I call it. It is where I stay off the main roads, traveling down roads I have never been on. The best part is I have the music jamming and thinking of nothing but the music and the good times. The normal 20 minute ride home took about an hour, probably not smart seeing how gas prices are, but what the hell on this day I needed some QT with me myself and I and the music.

Sept. 6
Happy Birthday Renee.

And Dad, I can't believe it has been 5 years. I miss you so much. Love you, from your spoiled rotten brat.