Kim called me early yesterday morning at work. She informed me that one of our buddies had committed suicide. Even as I am typing this I still cannot believe it. This guy was so genuine. We hadn’t seen him in quite a while, which I am kicking myself in the ass for now. We have all been in this vicinity and still we fell out of touch. I am sitting here thinking of all the awesome times we had. His smile brightened any situation. How you go from being so happy all of the time to actually taking your life? You know how the rumors go and we will probably never know what exactly happened, but we were told he told his wife he loved her then walked outside and shot himself in his driveway. WTF? How do you reach that point? Trust me ever since Mom passed, I have been through my share of emotions, but never once could I even imagine feeling that way. There are always options and people to help you. Then I think what if our little group had stayed in touch like we were back then. You know we all had each other’s back without thinking twice. I know I can’t drive myself crazy with the “What Ifs?” but damn. We would have let him know that he was loved and we could work through anything. This brings up the story of how people come into your life for a reason, season or lifetime. What or who determines the length of time that people are in your lives? I guess bottom line is the circumstances that happen in your life determine your path. Even though we are all still in a 20 mile radius, we are worlds apart. We grow up and apart, but that is not to say that if we all met today that it would be just like it was years ago. OK so it probably wouldn’t be a kegger out at the ball diamonds, but it would be one hell of a BBQ with all their kids and spouses.
I send this out to our Buddy, Carl. Your shit eating grin and smile brightened up our lives. Kim and I could always count on you to give us as much shit as we gave others. We had some great times back in the day, doing nothing, but having a few and torturing others with our smart ass comments. You are truly one in a million and will be missed. Love ya Buddy!
In Loving Memory of Carl Ferguson
Forever and Always in our Hearts!
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